Unique New York

Just like a regular woman, only crankier.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Two Weddings and a Funeral

This weekend, we had to choose between two weddings. Both were friends of my husband, and both were involved in our wedding. After much deliberation, we opted for the wedding of the friend that guilted us the most.

We are probably wedding snobs now, but we really loved our wedding. That said, it was hard not to reference our own during their nuptials. Long story short, we were really thankful that our photographer was discete and pleasant, and using the more updated photography techniques, unlike their guy who was one step away from using a pinhole camera. Hey, even a crank camera can be charming, but the photographer decidedly was not. I hope for the couple's sake the photos will turn out well.

Funny bit about the hotel:

I made reservations for us at the Extended Stay in Horsham, PA, where the couple had blocks of rooms. The guest services guy who took my reservation information inspired such confidence in me, that I left wondering if I would lose my identity due to credit card theft. As if that weren't enough, I found out hours before we left on Friday that our reservation had been inadvertently cancelled. No big deal, right? Who else could be staying in Horsham? I mean, where the hell is Horsham anyway?

Turns out the US Navy knows where Horsham is, and had managed to schedule their Navy weekend the same weekend as the wedding. So, hotels were not exactly flowing like water.

We drive to Pennsylvania without much incident, but then once we get there, we were tracking our mileage in an effort to find the damn hotel. I nearly turned onto a road blockade as a result. I called the hotel, and realized that the hotel was located about 500 yards away from the depicted address. Awesome. And the sign on the major road? No light. Why? Because the Extended Stay shared a sign with a nursery that had gone out of business, hence the blockade.

Oh, and our reservation that had supposedly been reinstated? Haha. Nope. We got a random room. And. It. Smelled. Like. Dried. Ass. It stank so bad that I bought Febreze the next day. Oy.

Later that night, as I was bathing, Russ comes in from downstairs and said that there was a guy passed out in the hallway. I was worried that the guy would die or something. I called downstairs and told the front desk that the guy wasn't being a problem or anything, he was just passed out, and we were worried for him and thought they should know. The lady responded, "I ain't security or nothin. I'll call the police if he gets violent, but I ain't doin' nothin."


So, we survived the rank hotel, complete with ghetto bunnies arguing and threatening to "go off" in the parking lot. I could have cared if they shot each other as long as they were quiet about it. The walls were so thin that I was worried we would hear their annoying banter all night. Also, we had to have the window open to air out the rotting corpse who smoked habitually smell.

As a capper, the chair in our room had a large urine stain in the seat.

But enough of that.

Anyway, the couple looked astounding. They are both gorgeous and have beautiful skin. They have the kind of classy movie-star faces and figures that looked like they have been chiseled out of soap. The important part is, they really love each other.

Also, I met many people in the puppet community, including my husband's boss. It was good to put names to faces. Also, I got to see my Russell in a nice suit. He cleans up real good.

So now for the bad news. Russ's grandfather died last week. He had cancer. I hate cancer. It has taken many good people away. Ech. Anyway, the family flew out today for the service. I am waiting for Russ to come home. I am sure he will be drained.

In the meantime, I am taking quizzes in preparation for my neuropsy mid-term next week. Can you locate the central sulcus and define the difference between the EPSP and the IPSP? Neither can I, so that's it for me tonight.


  • At 9:13 PM , Blogger Mizzou379 said...

    Your experience reminds me of Four Rooms - a movie that sucked except for the third room where there was a dead fucking whore beneath the matress. I believe it was entitles "The Misbehavors". At least you didn't have the bellhop (like there was one) rub mentholatum ointment on your eyes so you would stay in bed and not get up.

  • At 11:24 AM , Blogger Natalie said...

    Sorry to hear about his grandfather. My dog has just finished up 9 months of chemotherapy for lymphoma (and she kicked it's ass might I say). While that doesn't compare to a grandfather struggling with it, I get how much it sucks. Change of subject--> My ex-fiance and I used to escape to Dallas once a month and the first time we went, we stayed at this HORRIBLE hotel. It smelled like death, there was fighting in the hallway throughout the night and the police even came to visit! The next time we went we stayed at the Galleria and had to drive by the scary hotel to get there. It had been leveled...we had been there just the month before and it was GONE!...awesome.

  • At 8:07 AM , Blogger Chase said...

    How sad. I usually love staying in hotels. When I was in 7th grade and my church went to somewhere remote for an alleged mission trip, the hotel received 14 different complaints about a room playing loud music. I was staying in said room.

  • At 7:01 AM , Blogger Mizzou379 said...

    Yes, it is Dr. Porter. F-ing insurance. She's the only one covered by my insurance.

  • At 7:03 AM , Blogger Mizzou379 said...

    You have no idea how much I appreciate your advice, by the way. Truly.


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